Tuesday, August 30, 2005

BRITNEY SPEARS SPARES NO BULLSHIT



Britney's Tearful Tête-à-Tête?

Did Brit make a teen actress cry? Plus, a romance rundown with Ryan and Rachel, the latest on Jen and Vince and much more …

Aug. 29, 2005

Britney Spears: protective big sister or hormonal buttinsky? According to the New York Post, the soon-to-pop star took time out of her busy schedule of growing the spawn of Kevin Federline and picking out the ugliest maternity clothes ever to make a young girl cry.

The waterworks allegedly took place last week when the Britster swung by the set of little sister Jamie Lynn's hit Nickelodeon show "Zoey 101" and had a stern sit-down with 13-year-old actress Alexa Nikolas, who has been on the outs with her doppelganger sibling.

A "Zoey" mole tattles to the paper that Spears, 23, had the co-star summoned to Jamie Lynn's trailer, "where she proceeded to scream that Alexa was an 'evil little girl' and that she had better watch herself or she 'will never work in this town again!'"

Such bullying behavior sure doesn't sound like the baby-talk-prone Britney we know and love to poke fun at, but the source continues, "Alexa was in tears. She was sobbing and totally upset -- I mean, she has been buying Britney CDs since she was 6, and then Britney tears her to pieces? It was totally uncalled for ... And the fight was a petty, 13-year-old thing between Alexa and Jamie Lynn, who is becoming a real pest. Britney should have stayed out of it."

A rep for the Spears sisters admits a gab session occurred between the teen and the pregnant pop tartlet, but insists that a concerned Britney was merely playing peacemaker.

"Jamie Lynn and another girl on set were having problems, as 13-year-olds do," the spokeswoman explains the paper. "Britney did have words with the girl, but felt she was sticking up for her sister. She did not yell by any means, she just gave the girl a sisterly talking-to and wondered why they just couldn't all get along."

Speaking of Britney and blubbering teens, Us Weekly says there were some crushed tykes at her performing arts camp in Massachusetts after she once again failed to put in an end-of-summer appearance (Spears was also a no-show last year, ostensibly because of her knee injury).

The camp "is just a tax break for Britney," a source sneers to the mag. "She doesn't care about disappointing the kids."

Not true, counters a Spears confidante, who offers up a very reasonable explanation for her absence: "She loves that place, but she is about to give birth and can't fly across the country!" Brit, rumored to be expecting a boy who may or may not be named Preston, is said to be due in the next month or so.

Meanwhile, Britney seems to have blocked out any bad associations she may have with Las Vegas, the scene of her drive-by nuptials to childhood chum Jason Alexander (who, come to think of it, really isn't looking so bad at this point).

The Las Vegas Review-Journal reports she's moving forward with talks to follow in the high-heeled footsteps of Celine Dion and Elton John by becoming a "long-term" headline act in Sin City, perhaps by 2007 or 2008.

And finally, Christina Aguilera is steamed that the tabloids think she has nothing better to do than take potshots at her onetime rival. The cotton-candy-coiffed chanteuse is firing back at recent reports in which she was quoted as saying Mrs. Federline has "let herself go" and she didn't see "a comeback in the cards."

"It's really sad to see that some tabloid magazines still have to manufacture ill will between Britney and me," Aguilera declared on her Web site (via MTV). "We are both grown-ups and have the utmost respect for each other personally and professionally. If certain journalists want to throw their integrity out the window by spreading false information, then so be it. But I'm not falling for their lies and neither should my fans or Britney's."

And just so there's no question about her warm-fuzzy feelings towards the Federlines, the pint-sized belter adds, "May they be blessed with continued success and future happiness."

Monday, August 29, 2005

FROM COURTNEY LOVE TO THE LAST AMERICAN VIRGIN


COURTNEY MY LOVE

Guess why I am posting this attractive and seductive cover picture of Courtney Love on the Rolling Stone?

I am ready to pay one million dollars to Courtney to spend just one night with me and her life will never be the same again.

Now Courtney Love is the opposite of Judith Stegman who could be the last American Virgin who is still a virgin at 49!

You doubt me? Or you doubt her?

Well, how can she prove to me that she is still a virgin?
There is only one way to prove it.
Let her spend just one night with me. And in the morning, she can do another virginity test.

C'mon!
Let's boggie-woggie from the top to the bottom.

Coogan and Love deny baby claim

Source: Daily Post

CLAIMS that singer Courtney Love is carrying Steve Coogan's baby were
denied by both stars.

The showbiz world was left stunned by reports that the wild woman of
rock was pregnant by the Alan Partridge star after a two-week fling.
But Coogan's spokeswoman scoffed at the claims and insisted: "It's
nonsense."

Drug addict Love, 41, the widow of Nirvana frontman Kurt Cobain, was
said to have enjoyed an affair with Coogan while they were both
staying at the Sunset Marquis hotel in West Hollywood.

In a statement yesterday, Love denied the claims.

"Courtney Love wishes to make it clear that she denies recent stories
suggesting she is pregnant or has had a relationship with Steve
Coogan," said Sanctuary Artist Management. Love is currently in rehab
after admitting using drugs while on probation for three separate drug
and assault cases.

Coogan, 39, has admitted cheating on his wife Caroline Hickman with
two lapdancers.

Knightley hates attention in private life

Source: World Entertainment News Network

Hollywood actress KEIRA KNIGHTLEY avoids partying at London's trendiest night spots because she hates the attention she receives in them.

The 20-year-old British beauty prefers to keep a low-key profile when out on the town and sticks to nights out at her local pub with friends where nobody bothers her.

Knightley says, "I certainly don't court attention, which is why I've never been to clubs like Chinawhite."

"I'd rather be with my friends having a pint. And I can still do that without any problems." (AR/WNTST/GES)

Crowe's outbursts result In great acting

Source: World Entertainment News Network

(WENN via COMTEX) -- Oscar-winning film-maker RON HOWARD is happy to tolerate RUSSELL CROWE's temper tantrums, because they usually precede his best performances.

The former HAPPY DAYS star has teamed up with Crowe twice - on 2001's A BEAUTIFUL MIND and this year's (05) CINDERELLA MAN - and he has found approaching the Australian actor with simple logic is the best way to transform his anger into mesmerising acting.

He says, "Working with Russell, I always say, is a little but like filming on a tropical island.

"You know the weather's going to change several times during the course of the day, but you also know it's a beautiful island and you want to be there, and if you just wait a few minutes the sun will come out.

"You know, he does have a quick temper. But I always approach him at these moments with simple logic and I always find that it works."
(AR/WNBINS/SC)

Black's Leaning Tower of Pisa fantasy

Source: World Entertainment News Network

PIXIES frontman FRANK BLACK fantasizes about tearing down Italy's Leaning Tower Of Pisa because he loves causing controversy on his travels.

The DEBASER hitmaker - who released his solo album HONEYCOMB earlier this month (AUG05) - has already drawn up plans to topple Pisa's famously crooked landmark.

The 40-year-old singer says, "It would be fun. You could probably do it with a kite string or something, just pop it over.

"Everyone would be outraged." (AS/WNSINS/SC)

IS JUDITH STEGMAN THE OLDEST VIRGIN IN AMERICA AT 49?

Virgins by choice, women embrace ancient ministry

By: Patricia Montemurri

Source: Detroit Free Press

Judith Stegman wants to reclaim the word "virgin" from the jokes,satire and stigma.

When people ask whether she's married, the 49-year-old Haslett resident replies, "Yes, and no."

"I'm not married to a man, but I'm far from being single," Stegman tells people. "I'm a consecrated virgin in the Catholic Church."

At a time when virginity is getting the Hollywood laugh-track treatment -- the movie "The 40 Year-Old Virgin" opened Friday and was No. 1 at the box office over the weekend, raking in $20.6 million.

Stegman wants to celebrate the V-word for its beauty and integrity.

"An important part of being this," she said, "is not to be afraid to say it."

But it took even Stegman a while to do so with a serene smile.

"I'm not remaining a virgin because I'm repressing some part of sexuality, or giving everything to my work, or refraining from loving relationships," Stegman said Friday. "I'm invited to a loving relationship with Christ."

She is one of about 160 women in the United States, and seven in Michigan, who are consecrated virgins. They are members of a little-known ministry that dates to Christianity's earliest days.

These women pursue a spiritual vocation, but not as members of a convent or religious order. They work as teachers, nurses, lawyers or,like Stegman, certified public accountants. They support themselves,follow a life of prayer and, in the words of Catholic canon law, are "mystically betrothed to Christ."

On her left ring finger, Stegman wears a silver band fashioned to resemble an ancient oil lamp. It symbolizes her betrothal to Jesus Christ and evokes the imagery of the gospel parable about 10 virgins, five of whom had lanterns lacking oil. Without it, they were unready for the return of the bridegroom, a symbol for Christ.

Getting comfortable with calling.

Raised in a Catholic family in Cincinnati, Stegman, the oldest of six children, said she was inspired by the nuns who taught her. She dated in high school and at Michigan State University in the 1970s, but found it never as exciting or fulfilling as her girlfriends did.

She flourished as an accountant, but struggled with how to nurture her religious calling. Then a friend pointed out an article about consecrated virgins in a journal. She approached the Diocese of Lansing, studied with a spiritual director and began praying the Liturgy of the Hours, which all priests and religious sisters say daily.

But even when she was consecrated in a Lansing ceremony at St. Thomas Aquinas Church in 1993, Stegman had trouble embracing the language.The invitations to the rite and breakfast reception didn't mention the word "virgin." Instead, guests were invited to celebrate a "commitment to a life of celibacy in the Catholic Church."

It took years of prayer, meetings with other consecrated virgins and experiencing the respect others showed her before Stegman was more comfortable discussing her calling. Now, she prays formally several times a day at a private chapel in her basement, a room decorated with religious paintings and miniature stained-glass pieces propped up against a window.

By special permission of the Lansing bishop, Stegman prays before at abernacle that contains the Holy Eucharist, the consecrated communion bread that Catholics believe is the body of Christ. The triangular cabinet was built by Stegman's father, gilded by a sister and adorned with handmade wooden religious symbols by a friend who is a Catholic deacon.

"It's a distinct privilege to have it in my home," Stegman said. "I want Christ in my home. For a consecrated virgin, it's like having her spouse at home."

During the busy tax season at her Lansing office, she'll close the door, light a candle and take 15 minutes for prayer. She sits on the finance committees of the Diocese of Lansing and her parish, sings in the church choir and is a board member of the Michigan Catholic Conference, the policy-making arm of Michigan's seven Catholic dioceses.

A position of honor

Still, she said, the vocation is "one of being and not of doing. ...It's more of who you are in relation to God."

At St. Thomas Aquinas parish in East Lansing, active parishioners "know of her and hold her in high regard for the witness of her life," said the Rev. Steven Mattson, associate pastor.

When five men, including Mattson, were ordained to the priesthood in June in the Lansing diocese, Stegman recited a reading to showcase her little-known vocation. Mattson said there are similarities between the role of the diocesan parish priest, who often lives alone and without the community of other priests, and the singular nature of Stegman's calling.

While there continues to be a sharp decline in the ranks of priests and nuns in the Catholic Church in America, there are about 1,500 consecrated virgins worldwide, with the largest contingents in France and Argentina. There are no consecrated virgins in the Archdiocese of Detroit. Stegman said two women currently are preparing for the rite in Michigan.

She is president of the U.S. Association of Consecrated Virgins, and is paring back some of her accounting work to focus even more on her faith. The association's Web site, www.consecratedvirgins.org, is maintained by a consecrated hermit in Oregon. That's another rite open.

Saturday, August 27, 2005

DON'T FALL IN LOVE WITH THE PLAYER



Take my word for it.

You should take your time to read the post below.
It is for your own good.

Don't fall in love with the player.
The rock and rolling female player is the one that can drive you round the bend.

Friday, August 26, 2005

ARE YOU A FEMALE PLAYER?


Most of our actresses are the most celebrated players on earth.
I mean you don't know when they are in love and they are acting.
They change lovers like they change roles.


Are you a female player?

Many babes are actually players, but they pretend otherwise.
I have met many girls and young women who told me.
"Sorry. But, it is not wise to put all your eggs in one basket. I mean you cannot pin all your hopes on one man alone. What if he lets you down. Then, you have lost it all. No back up to fall on. It is only smart to have a top ten chart of all your guys. I mean like a pyramid scheme. You dictate the terms of the relationships. The highest bidder could be the eventual winner. The best man could turn out to be the worst later. So, there will always be someone you can run to and lean on when the chips are down or when the cookie crumbles."

I was the best friend of a female player before she finally settled down.She was hot and sexy. She had a birthday every month. So, there were so many guys bringing her birthday presents every month. And I must not squeal. We joked and laughed over these games. And she got away with it. But, not all female players are that lucky. I mean female players should not be in your good books.

Here is a very fresh article on the female player and how to tell her apart.

The ups and downs of dating a female player
By Jonathan Small

Listen in as one man shares what it's like to go out with one of these irresistible but dangerous creatures: The female player.

Whose relationship history includes...
Whose faith is...

"Tonight would be the night," my friend Johnny told himself.

He'd dated the lovely Sarah off and on—flirting with her over $15 cocktails at swanky clubs, trying to get closer and being pushed away. He finally decided to go for it—to show her how he really felt and pull her into his orbit once and for all. Off they went to New York for the weekend and all was going well. They laughed and kissed over dinner at a hip Japanese restaurant... that is, until a guy named Brad happened to appear.

Sarah had mentioned to her "friend," as she called Brad, that she might be in town for the weekend, and let slip the name of the place where she and Johnny would be dining. Since Brad knew the hottest parties in town, Sarah thought the three of them could team up to hit a few. Before Johnny could raise any objections, his romantic date was co-opted into a group outing—one where he was forced to watch Brad and Sarah bump and grind all night. The kicker? She ended up spending the rest of the weekend with Brad. And Johnny? He was devastated. He had no idea women acted that way. He'd been used... and it wasn't a pretty sensation.

Players. Long a label associated exclusively with men (James Bond, Mr. Big, and Alfie, to name a few), this term has increasingly become all too fitting for a growing number of women as well. Like their male counterparts, female players are always stringing along numerous suitors and thriving on all the attention—not to mention the flower deliveries. What makes her tick? And can we guys stop ourselves from falling for her? As someone who's dated one or two of these ladies (and recoils at the memory), let me share what I can on the subject. First, the good news:

Female player fact #1: There's a definite ego boost that comes from dating her.
These women don't get all this attention from guys because they're wallflowers or plain Janes. They are dazzling conversationalists, well-dressed, and very capable flirts. Says Paul, 37, "I've dated a couple of women like this, and, I have to say, they present themselves in such a great way. It's like dating a character on Sex and the City. They're full of funny stories, and they always have beautiful hair, beautiful nails, great clothes. When you're out with one of them, you feel like a clever, Hugh Grant type out on the town." That's part of what keeps a guy coming back to these women—they feel as if they're part of a rarefied, fabulous world when they're with her. Oh, and there's one more specific way in which they dazzle a guy, as you'll see in my next point.

Female player fact #2: She has incredible lingerie.
All of the guys I interviewed who had dated a female player said the same thing (looking rather dreamy-eyed): Great lingerie. "This is not the kind of girl who's going to be caught dead in plain cotton undies," says Tony, 41. "The woman I dated? She toyed with my emotions, that's for sure. But I can't help but be nostalgic for her lingerie drawer. I'd never seen anything like it. Talk about a kid in a candy store. I guess she'd accumulated that wardrobe to keep her different suitors enticed."

Now, the less-than-good news:
Female player fact #3: These women are on a power trip.
These women believe the pleasure of their company is a treasure men should work for. One player named Christie, 28, explains it this way: "I don't throw myself at guys; I see dates as a trade-off: The guy gets to be seen with a hot girl at a restaurant, and I get to eat sushi for free," she says. "I had a male friend take me to get a couples massage. He got to see me in a towel and I got pampered at a nice hotel. Sounds fair, don't you think?"

Obviously, a guy's ego can take a real butt-whupping from this kind of treatment. I don't know about you, but feeling like a doggie chasing a premium biscuit isn't exactly a sensation I cherish in my personal life. Knowing that these women see themselves as "above you" is a real cold shower in my book.

It goes without saying that guys love the thrill of the chase—and that's exactly what a female player gives them by keeping the relationship casual. "Guys don't like it when you're too eager and available, so I keep my schedule booked," explains Mary, a chic blonde who usually juggles a handful of suitors. "When you make a guy work for it, he really ramps up the romance—he's doing everything he can to impress you and be the last man standing. I'm really amazed by how hard a man will try to win me over: Orchids, dinner at the most in-demand restaurants, incredible love notes—sometimes even jewelry. It's almost embarrassing what a guy will do to get the girl."

Embarrassing, yeah. A female player's way of remaining cool, coveted and non-committal can drive a guy crazy. The prophet Jay-Z once said, "Don't hate the player, hate the game," but that's a tall order. My best advice? If you find yourself drawn into the web of one of these women, set your pride aside—and bring your checkbook.

Jonathan Small has been played like an Xbox by several women. A freelance writer based in Los Angeles, he's also co-author of the new book, The Best Places to Kiss in Southern California.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Article courtesy of Happen magazine, HAPPEN MAGAZINE

DESIREE COMPTON RETURNS HOME.

Scout Taylor-Compton the teen star that was reported missing has been found alive and well.
We thank God that nothing bad happened to this American sweetheart.

08-25) 18:09 PDT Apple Valley, Calif. (AP) --
A teen actress who recently starred in the comedy "Sleepover" was reunited with her family Thursday, two weeks after she went missing.
Scout Taylor-Compton had last been seen on Aug. 12 at her family's home in San Bernardino County.

The Apple Valley Police Department learned about the girl's whereabouts from school officials Thursday and returned her to her family, said Jodie Miller, a spokeswoman for the San Bernardino County Sheriff's Department.
"She seems to be unharmed, no evidence of any criminal activity during the time she was missing," Miller said.

The department previously said the girl was believed to be a runaway.
Additional details were not immediately available.
"On behalf of her family, we are very grateful to everyone for their concern and support in helping to find Scout. We appreciate everyone's courtesy as the family recovers," a publicist for Taylor-Compton said in a statement.
In addition to 2004's "Sleepover," Taylor-Compton played a bit part in "13 Going on 30," with Jennifer Garner, and recently landed a leading role in the Bravo series "Hidden Howie."

She's also appeared on WB's "Gilmore Girls" and worked on multiple independent films and music videos.

Taylor-Compton had just finished filming an independent film called "Tomorrow Is Today" in New Jersey in June and was to be in Canada in August to discuss a lead role in an upcoming feature film.

Taylor-Compton also goes by the name Desiree Compton, department officials said.

Thursday, August 25, 2005

FROM YAHOO WITH LOVE


SCOUT TAYLOR-COMPTON HAS GONE AWOL!

The news all over Hollywood is that teen actress Scout Taylor-Compton is missing and this not fiction. I just hope she has not gone AWOL to elope with her lover somewhere. Teenage girls are more adventurous than even Boy Scouts. And since her first name is Scout, she could have followed the Boy Scouts to a jamboree. And since her first feature was "A.W.O.L", she has decided to play that role in reality.

Please, we are looking for her!

Teen Actress Scout Taylor-Compton Missing
Wed Aug 24,10:38 PM ET

Scout Taylor-Compton, star of the recent teen comedy "Sleepover," has been missing from her California home for nearly two weeks, officials and her publicist said Wednesday. A spokeswoman for the San Bernardino Sheriff said the young actress was likely a runaway.

The 16-year-old was last seen at home on Aug. 12, according to a statement released by her family.
"We sincerely appreciate everyone's attention and concern regarding Scout and are praying for her safe return," the statement read. "We have faith in the agencies working on the case and are optimistic that the outcome will be positive."
One sheriff's deputy has been assigned to the case, and the family has hired a private investigator, said sheriff's spokeswoman Robin Haynal.

Haynal said Taylor-Compton also goes by the name Desiree Compton.
Besides 2004's "Sleepover," Taylor-Compton played a bit part in "13 Going on 30," with Jennifer Garner, and recently landed a leading role in the Bravo series "Hidden Howie."

She's also appeared on WB's "Gilmore Girls" and worked in independent films and music videos. In June she finished filming an independent film called "Tomorrow Is Today" in New Jersey.

"Her parents are completely distraught," said her publicist Laura Marks.

Search on for Missing Teen Actress
By Marcus ErricoWed Aug 24, 9:30 PM ET

Teen actress Scout Taylor-Compton, known to TV viewers for her recurring roles on Gilmore Girls and Charmed, has gone missing from her California home.
Her family and police confirmed that the 16-year-old, whose credits also include a starring role in the 2004 teen comedy Sleepover and a bit part in in the 2004 Jennifer Garner comedy 13 Going on 30, had not been seen at her home in Apple Valley, about an hour northeast of Los Angeles, since Aug. 12.

"We sincerely appreciate everyone's attention and concern regarding Scout and are praying for her safe return," the family said in a statement Wednesday. "We have faith in the agencies working on the case and are optimistic that the outcome will be positive."

The San Bernadino Sheriff's Department says there is no indication of foul play and the actress is likely a runaway. A sheriff's deputy has been assigned to the case, and the family has also hired a private investigator.

According to a biography posted on IMDb.com, Compton, who sometimes goes by the nickname Desiree, had been in New Jersey filming an indie feature titled Tomorrow Is Today in June. She was said to be "in Canada meeting with a director for a lead role in a new feature film" in August, although no date was provided for the meeting.
Although she isn't a name-brand celeb, Compton had been steadily employed in Hollywood since she was 10. She played a fairy in several episodes of Charmed, most recently in May, and had a recurring role as Clara Forester on Gilmore Girls, her last appearance coming in October.

This year she has also been seen on Cold Case and That's So Raven, and she recently scored a starring role in Bravo's new Howie Mandel series, Hidden Howie. Previous TV credits include a recurring stint on The Guardian and guest roles on Ally McBeal, ER, Frasier; her first feature film was a 1999 independent called A.W.O.L.
Anyone with information on the actress' whereabouts is urged to call the sheriff's department.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

TOM HANKS FACES DA VINCE CODE PROTESTERS IN ENGLAND!



Ignorance is the problem of most people claiming to know God. But, they misunderstand his ways. Because, they misrepresent him. God does not need anyone to defend Him. God knows how to defend himself. Therefore, all the so called "Christians" protesting against Tom Hanks in the production of the Da Vince Code need a shrink. Tom Hanks should just ignore them and have a drink on me.

Hanks faces DaVinci code protesters

Source: World Entertainment News Network

Oscar-winning actor TOM HANKS was faced by protestors including nuns,
as he began filming scenes for the upcoming film adaptation of DAN
BROWN's best-selling novel THE DA VINCI CODE in England yesterday
(15AUG05).

The demonstration took place outside Lincoln Cathedral, which is
doubling for London's Westminster Abbey, where religious leaders only
agreed to allow filming after the movie's producers made a $180,000
(100,000) donation.

Hanks, who will only be in Lincoln for two days, was chauffeur-driven
the short distance from his five star hotel to the historic location -
and he briefly waved at a small gathering of fans, who vied with
demonstrators for his attention, before disappearing inside.

The cathedral's Dean, The Very Reverand ALEC KNIGHT, has dismissed
Brown's 20 million-selling book as "a load of old tosh", but he was
unable to turn down the offer which gives priceless publicity to his
spiritual home.

However, demonstrators outside the cathedral have taken exception to
Brown's questioning of their religious beliefs, and were led in a 12
hour prayer vigil by Catholic nun Sister MARY MICHAEL.

The 61-year-old says, "I just don't think it is right that they are
filming this story here. I know the Bishop and Dean argue that it is
fiction - and it might even be brilliant fiction - but it is against
the very essence of what we believe." (SC/WNTEX)



Cleese to undergo colon surgery

Source: World Entertainment News Network

Comic legend JOHN CLEESE is to undergo surgery on his colon to
alleviate diverticulitis - and he plans to auction the parts of his
anatomy surgeons remove on his personal website.

The MONTY PYTHON funnyman and actor, 65, jokes with fans in a
statement released on the internet that he developed the condition,
which is prevalent in older people with a low fibre diet, because of
his "gluttony".

He even takes the joke so far as to suggest parts of his digestive
system will shortly be available for his most dedicated fans to
purchase.

The statement continues: "The cure is to have the bit of the gut that
has all the little pockets cut out. A very nice surgeon will be doing
this.

"The infected bit which has been cut out by the surgeon will be
offered for sale on the website in the next few days.

"Proceeds from the sale will be divided between JC (John Cleese) and
the very nice surgeon." (SC/WNTEX)



Mortensen's fish charm

Source: World Entertainment News Network

VIGGO MORTENSEN used an unusual lucky charm on the set of new movie A
HISTORY OF VIOLENCE - a life-size plastic fish.

The LORD OF THE RINGS star nabbed the anatomically-correct trout from
his on-screen daughter, who was given the fish as a toy, and he
carried it everywhere he went.

Mortensen explains, "It was a compulsive thing after a while. I felt
like it was unlucky not to have the trout, so I would sneak it in. It
became this game to see if I could keep getting away with it."

His secret was blown when he accidentally dropped the fish on camera,
on the last day of the shoot - in front of director DAVID CRONENBERG.

The actor adds, "David was appalled." (IG/EW/SC)

Send feedback about this Ezine to:
entertainmenttoday.editor@arcamax.com


Television Review: Beautiful People

By: Eakta Khangura

Source: U-WIRE

(U-WIRE) ANN ARBOR, Mich. -- In an ironic twist unexpected of parent
child-friendly ABC Family, the channel's new show "Beautiful People"
serves as a perfect homage to our image-obsessed culture. It reminds
you of a standard Monet.From far away, the show looks like a
refreshing take on the role beauty plays within our culture. A closer
look, however, reveals that it utterly lacks the panache or unified
execution to make up for the absence of substance, ultimately making
it a vapid primetime soap opera. And with most of its parts husked off
of other, more colorful beasts, most things on the "Beautiful People"
set give the viewer a pretty annoying sense of Deja Vu.

"Beautiful People" introduces us to the Kerrs, a middle-class family
made up of three women who have just been relocated to New York City
from New Mexico. Lynn, played by Daphne Zuniga (TV's "Melrose Place"),
is the strong matriarch of the family who decides to go to New York
after her younger daughter, Sophie, played by relative newcomer Sarah
Foret, wins a scholarship to prestigious Manhattan prep school
Brighton Academy. Tagging along is her older daughter Karen, played by
Torrey Devito, an aspiring model.

Shockingly, almost every fictional television family manages to get
one kid into an "exclusive" day school. Admissions standards are
certainly odd these days, aren't they?

The storyline focuses largely on Sophie's attempt to navigate the
stormy seas of adolescence amidst the decadent lifestyles of New York
society's creme-de-la-creme, also known as the "Beautiful People." She
is joined by new friends Gideon (Ricky Mabe) and Annabelle (Kathleen
Monroe), the aforementioned beautiful outcasts.

Lord knows the idea of people born into a world of wealth and
entitlement is certainly nothing new. In the end, the show becomes
like every other WB teen drama currently on the air.

"Beautiful People" attempts to be the edgier version of "Gilmore
Girls" by showing fifteen year olds doing lines of coke in the
bathroom of a meet-and-greet party on the first day back at school
(because, of course, all rich kids are on drugs), while still
retaining the saccharine sweetness of the perfect mother-daughter
relationships so elusive in the real world.

Eating disorders also occupy a fair share of screen time: Paisley
(played by Jordan Mabley), Queen Bee of the "BPs" (the nickname of the
Beautiful People) is bulimic in order to fit into her size-two Helmut
Lang's. And Anorexia Nervosa rears its overplayed head in the sister,
Karen -- because, for every skinny beautiful model-wannabe, there is
someone skinnier and more beautiful. These are all certainly fine plot
devices -- for 1997.

Most conventional seems to be the storyline developing around Lynn,
who just happens to run into an old flame at the aforesaid
meet-and-greet, played by James McCaffrey (TV's "Rescue Me"). It's
only natural to move across the country, enroll your daughter in the
most posh prep school on the East Coast and run in "the one that got
away," a.k.a. Julian Fiske. OK, now they are just stretching reality.

The banality of the plotline does not stop there. Mr. Fiske just so
happens to be the father of Nicholas Fiske (Jackson Rathbone), the
leader of the Beautiful People and young Sophie's crush. The apple
does not fall far from the tree in either case. Nor does the plotting,
which, in this case, seems to have fallen from a really, really
convoluted tree.

If the show is any indication, ABC Family should stick to cartoons and
feel-good family movies and leave the angst-ridden teen drama genre to
those who know it best. Taking a warmed-over concept and tossing some
notes cribbed straight from "Mean Girls" isn't the most
forward-thinking of concepts.

ABC Family needs to make up their minds -- either "Beautiful People"
must be witty or chock full of stylish diversions. Otherwise, it
remains as inconspicuous as their other teen drama, "Wildfire" (if you
have no idea what I'm talking about, then that's exactly the point).
Of course, eerily like the ultra-skinny Manhattan scions, when the
style of a show is this played out, it only makes what little
substance there is look that much worse.

Monday, August 22, 2005

How to Deal with Control Freaks!

How to Work with Control Freaks

by Albert J. Bernstein
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Why are some people obsessed with control? Why do they insist that everything be done their way even when your way works just as well -- or even better? You know them: They're the fear-driven colleagues who question and complain unless every task is done as they would do it, bosses who think they never have enough information to make a final decision, or bean counters who delay important orders because they're checking boxes over and over again. Here's why they are like they are, and three steps for dealing with control freaks.

Control freaks see themselves as burdened with the task of protecting an ungrateful world from mistakes. They are seldom aware of the fear that drives their behavior.

Imagine a dog inside an electric fence. After he touches it once or twice, you can turn off the power because he won't go near it again. That is how control freaks handle the possibility of mistakes. They try to keep a safe distance by obsessing about every detail lest even the tiniest of errors take them by surprise.

Of course, this strategy can be self-defeating. While it's good to avoid mistakes, people who take chances are the ones who succeed. Remember, Babe Ruth held the all-time record for strikeouts as well as for home runs. Thomas Edison, inventor of the electric light and the phonograph, patented 1,091 inventions, most of which no one ever found useful.

So what do you do if you have to work for a control freak? Getting mad and accusing him or her of being a control freak will only make the situation worse. She will see your behavior as evidence that you're not interested in doing things the "right" way.

The answer to working with control freaks lies in negotiation, not recrimination. A little reassurance that you take your tasks seriously won't hurt either. Remember that fear is the driving force behind their persistent meddling. Try these tips for controlling your control freak.

Tip 1: Every task has a goal, whether it's a report, a decision or a sale, and a process, the actual behaviors through which the goal is achieved. Negotiate to deliver a very specific product at a very specific time. Always try to set goals that can be measured. Send updates on your progress to forestall surprise checkups, but do not send a partially finished version of your project unless you want to reopen the negotiations.

Tip 2: Treat attempts to control the process as requests to change the end product, which any business person would have to agree reopens the whole negotiation. If the end product is not affected, why change the process? Keep thorough notes and bring them out when the person wants to meddle with the project. Ask whether the characteristics of the project's final goal are different now. If your manager says they aren't, respectfully ask why, if the goal is the same, the process to achieve it should be changed. This logic is difficult for anyone to refute, even a control freak. This strategy works best when you have some history of delivering the goods on time and in a satisfactory manner.

Tip 3: Hand over the deliverables on time, and stand firm on the point that you have met the deadline and your product conforms to all stated specifications. If you do what you say, when you say you'll do it, the control freak might go away and bother somebody less reliable.

Wondering whether you might be a control freak? Here's a surefire test. If, once every day, you can't publicly acknowledge that somebody else's way of doing something important was better than yours, start looking for that invisible electric fence around your mind.

Sunday, August 21, 2005

MICHAEL JACKSON LOOKS LIKE THE MUMMY!

Personally, I feel very sorry for the highly gifted Pop music icon Michael Jackson. But, his looks are best for the "Hammer House of Horror". The man needs a shrink more than the plastic surgeon. Whoever advised him to mutilate his beautiful African-American face must be an agent of the evil ones. Michael Jackson will fare better in horror movies.

N.B:
BECAUSE, OF THE PRESENT STATE OF THE FACIAL CONDITION OF WACKO JACKO WE CANNOT SHOW YOU HIS FACE. PLEASE, LET US BEAR WITH HIM.

Jackson juror labels singer 'a mummy'

Source: World Entertainment News Network

A tell-all juror in the MICHAEL JACKSON trial has blasted the singer
for having a face like a "mummy" and dressing like a clown.

RAY HULTMAN - who now says he regrets acquitting the THRILLER hitmaker
of child molestation charges in June (05) - was shocked by Jackson's
ghost-like features during the 14 week trial in Santa Maria,
California.

The 62-year-old is now intent on setting the record straight in his
forthcoming book THE DELIBERATOR.

He says, "Up close, his appearance is amazing. He wears a wig and his
face is caked in white make-up, which hides the prosthesis that serves
as the tip of his nose.

"One person who has seen him without the device says he resembles a
mummy with nostril holes."

Jackson was found not guilty on all 10 charges in June (05).
(AS/WNTSU/GES)



Griffith worked as stable hand on husband's new movie

Source: World Entertainment News Network

Hollywood actress MELANIE GRIFFITH accepted a mere $25 (14) per day
job as a stable hand on the set of her husband ANTONIO BANDERAS' new
action movie, so they could be close to one another.

The WORKING GIRLS actress, 47, joined her beau Banderas on the set of
forthcoming sequel THE LEGEND OF ZORRO and decided to shun her
onscreen profession to care for the film's stunt horses instead.

Banderas admits, "She was making $25 a day for working with the
horses.

"That's all the horse guys would pay."

The sequel to THE MASK OF ZORRO, the new movie will see Banderas again
co-star alongside CATHERINE ZETA-JONES and is set to hit screens this
October (05). (AS/WNTST/GES)



Cross cringes at sex scenes

Source: World Entertainment News Network

DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES star MARCIA CROSS hates filming steamy love
scenes, as she gets embarrassed stripping off and making out in front
of an entire TV crew.

The flame-haired actress recently shot an especially raunchy scene,
but was relieved when she found she was working with a different team
altogether - and the sense of anonymity spared her blushes.

She says, "Sex scenes are embarrassing. One scene was particularly
hard, but we didn't shoot with our regular crew.

"I didn't know any of them and that really helped me out."
(ZJS/WNTST/GES)



Miyazaki and Sandrelli set for Venice honors

Source: World Entertainment News Network

Italian actress STEFANIA SANDRELLI and Japanese film director HAYAO
MIYAZAKI will be presented with the prestigious Golden Lions at this
year's Venice Film Festival.

Movie maker Miyazaki, 64 - who had a recent hit with film HOWL'S
MOVING CASTLE - is hailed as one of Japan's greatest animation
directors.

And 59-year-old actress Sandrelli is being recognised for her
successful career in Italian and international cinema since her first
acclaimed performance in PIETRO GERMI's 1961 film DIVORCE ITALIAN
STYLE.

After hearing the news, the actress said, "It is a wonderful present
and I thank everyone who helped to make my career."

The pair will receive the prestigious honour at the festival which
opens 31 August and runs until 10 September (05). (AS/WNWCAG/JB)

Saturday, August 20, 2005

EVA THE DIVA


San Francisco | Shanghai | Seattle | Toronto | Washington DC December 16, 2004
America's Next Top Model: Eva Diva

One of Gothamist's guiltiest pleasures of late has been watching America's Next Top Model. So, after many weeks of stupidity, terrible clothes, and awesome put-downs from Janice Dickinson, we were both sad and excited to watch the finale last night. Down to the final three of Amanda, Yaya, and Eva, we were happily shocked when Eva, the 5'7" "tomboy" from California won. Shocked because she wasn't as chic as Yaya or as potentially editorially glamorous as Amanda, but happy because she wasn't as arrogant as Yaya or flatout spacey as Amanda (weeping about being in Japan? puh-lease). Sure, Eva annoyed us to no end at the beginning, but her observations were always the most honest (when dermatologically challenged Yaya won a facial, Eva said, "The girl who needed a facial won the facial."). Of course, we missed Tocarra and Norelle, but if there's anything we've learned about watching reality television, it's about choosing the lesser of evils - like tonight's Apprentice Finale.

Read the America's Next Top Model forum at Television Without Pity. And watch the finale again tomorrow night, on the UPN, and refer to our drinking game.

Friday, August 19, 2005

Kisses and What?


Sometimes, I laugh at myself.

The idea for my romantic blog http://kissesandroses.blogspot.com came from the French.
I hosted some of the "Poetry Nights" at the Maison de France in Ikoyi on the Lagos Island in Nigeria. And the French Cultural Centre is the base for many of the Artists and Artistes in Nigeria where we always performed. I had the world premiere of my "Sleepless Night" there in the summer of 2002. And I also performed my special love song for the Nigerian born Miss World Darego at the same venue in 2002. The numero uno in Afro Rock music in Nigeria, Dabyna Abraham was backing me. And the babes were already screaming at the rendition of my first verse. Since 17, babes always loved to see me on stage. I produced and directed my first play, "The Prodigal" at the National Museum in Lagos in 1980. I recorded my first song in 1984 at 21. But, I left music to go into Christian Missionary work till 2000. Then, I came back to record my second song, "She comes on Sundays" in 2003. I gave a copy only to the BBC to broadcast it with an interview on my performance poetry as political protest poet in Nigeria. I have decided to go commercial before the end of this year 2005.

My life is all about kisses and roses.There are hot kisses and cold kisses. And there are no roses without thorns. As Bishop T.D Jakes said, "Life is not a fairy tale."

I am recording a special CD for the benefit of the Children of Chornobyl Relief Fund (CCRF). You are all welcome to cooperate and support me for this charity.

Thursday, August 18, 2005

PLEASE, DON'T CALL ME P.DIDDY NO MORE!


Please, don't be silly.
I say don't call me P. Diddy.
Just call me Diddy.
C'mon! I am a Daddy.
Got that Billy?


P. Diddy No More

Sean Combs endures yet another name change.

August 17, 2005 - Sean "P. Diddy" Combs has announced that he will undergo yet another name change.

From this day forth (at least until he sees fit to change his moniker again) Combs would like be known simply as "Diddy."

Combs, who over the course of his career has been known as Puff Daddy, Puffy, Puff, P. Diddy, Sean, and just about every other configuration of the aforementioned that one can think of basically feels that the "P" is no longer needed in his name.

"I feel like the "P" is getting in the way of me and the public. From now on I will simply go by "Diddy" he said of his latest name change.

Despite his penchant for re-inventing his name every few years, Combs/Diddy is rather confident that this will be the final name that he will use and the name by which he will be remembered in the history books.

"Martha Stewart recently announced that she was using "M. Diddy" and it is rumored that Katie Couric has asked Matt to call her "K. Diddy," and we all know who is calling himself "W. Diddy" in private" Combs joked, showing how "Diddy" has already been ensconsed in the pop cultural lexicon.

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Please! Don't Make Me Laugh!


It's So Hot In Here...
The birds have to use pot holders to pull worms out of the ground.

Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard boiled eggs.

The cows are giving evaporated milk.

The trees are whistling for the dogs.

You can say 110 degrees without fainting.

You eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off.

The temperature drops below 95, you feel a bit chilly.

You discover that in August, it takes only 2 fingers to drive your motorcycle.

You discover that you can get a sunburn through your face shield.

You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.

Hot water now comes out of both taps.

You can actually burn your hand on the clutch lever.

No one would dream of wearing shorts and sitting on a vinyl motorcycle seat!

Your biggest motorcycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"

You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.

Riding breaks are measured by bottles of water rather than the need for gas.

Now that your yard has burnt, you do not have to spend time mowing but it is still to hot to ride.

You have to chew the air properly before you can swallow it.

The next person to ask you "Hot 'nuff for ya?" WILL receive a black eye.
Freezer Meals
I have changed my system for labeling homemade freezer meals. I used to carefully note in large clear letters, "Meatloaf" or "Pot Roast" or "Steak and Vegetables or "Chicken and Dumplings" or "Beef Pot Pie."

However, I used to get frustrated when I asked my husband what he wanted for dinner because he never asked for any of those things. So, I decided to stock the freezer with what he really likes.

If you look in my freezer now you'll see a whole new set of labels. You'll find dinners with neat little tags that say: "Whatever," "Anything," "I Don't Know," "I Don't Care," "Something Good," or "Food." My frustration is now reduced because no matter what my husband replies when I ask him what he wants for dinner, I know that it is there waiting.
This news arrived on: 08/16/2005

Barber and Kid
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."

The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves.

"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. "Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"

The boy licked his cone and replied, "Because the day I take the dollar, the game's over!"
This news arrived on: 08/16/2005

Chain Letters
I want to thank all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me your chain letters over the past two years.

Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy. Because of your concern.......

---

I no longer can drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

---

I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr. Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans.

---

I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.

---

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

---

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

---

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

---

I no longer receive packages from UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.

---

I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don't support our troops.

---

I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a stupid number for which I will get the phone bill from hell with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.

---

I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.

---

I no longer go to bars because someone will drug me and take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.

---

Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an email to 7 of my friends and make a wish within 5 minutes.

---

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl who has been dying for the past seven years.

---

I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program.

---

Now to Return the Favor:

If you don't send this e-mail to at least 1200 people in the next 60 seconds, a large bird with diarrhea will fly over your head at 5:00 PM and the fleas of a thousand camels will infest your armpits.

I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of a friend of a friend's neighbor's cousin, and he's a lawyer. So you'd better get going on that e-mail!!!
This news arrived on: 08/16/2005

Copyright © 2005 ArcaMax Publishing, Inc., and its licensors. All rights reserved.

Copyright © 2005 ArcaMax Publishing, Inc., and its licensors. All rights reserved.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

I LOVE THEM BIG AND BEAUTIFUL!



I will not marry any Thin Lizzy!

I have noticed the inferiority complex of most obese women in America and Europe. And I feel that this is erroneous.Because, the most Beautiful women in the world are usually fat. I mean they are big and beautiful. Personally, I prefer my babe to be plumpy and physically appealing. I remember my darling Somina. She was big and beautiful and desirable.Gosh! The first time I saw her in her tranparent night gown, I wanted to rush her the same way Bill rushed Monica to bed. And Somina was the wildest girlfriend I have ever had. She was fat and hot. Men wanted to beat me over her. They all wanted to sleep with her. We were the talk of the town. And we painted the town red. Somina rocked. She loved to drive fast cars and smoked with one hand and handled the steering with the other hand. Sometimes, I lighted the cigarette for her whilst she drove. She wouldn't sleep alone without me.

One day, we left the house and she was only in her T-Shirt and nothing else. I mean she was naked underneath the T-Shirt. We were stopped at a police check point and one of the police officers came around to her side and told her to come down. She said she couldn't do so,because, she was half naked. One of the cops looked in and saw her bare from thighs to her feet and he gaped and gasped like a man about to release in ejaculation. He motioned that we should go. And after that day they always hailed her anywhere they saw her. Somina was too lovable and to avoid turning this blog into a porn site, I will leave the rest of this true life experience to your imagination. But, I miss my big and beautiful Somina every day and night today. She was like my wife after I lost my German beauty Nikky in 1995.

In Nigeria, among my people in South Eastern Nigeria, we don't marry lean or thin girls or women. Would be brides are sent to the famous "Fattening House" to feed them very well to gain weight to make sure that they have well proportioned body to guarantee the sexual satisfaction of the husband. In most cases, the brides are already pregnant anyway.

Here is a good report on fattening brides in MAURITANIA.

Mauritania's 'wife-fattening' farm
By Pascale Harter
BBC, Mauritania



Obesity is so revered among Mauritania's white Moor Arab population that the young girls are sometimes force-fed to obtain a weight the government has described as "life-threatening".
A generation ago, over a third of women in the country were force-fed as children - Mauritania is one of the few African countries where, on average, girls receive more food than boys.

Now only around one in 10 girls are treated this way. The treatment has its roots in fat being seen as a sign of wealth - if a girl was thin she was considered poor, and would not be respected.

But in rural Mauritania you still see the rotund women that the country is famous for. They walk slowly, dainty hands on the end of dimpled arms, pinching multicoloured swathes of fabric together to keep the biting sand from their faces.

"I make them eat lots of dates, lots and lots of couscous and other fattening food," Fatematou, a voluminous woman in her sixties who runs a kind of "fat farm" in the northern desert town of Atar, told BBC World Service's The World Today programme.


When they are small they don't understand, but when they grow up they are fat and beautiful
Fatematou
'Fat farm' manager

Although she had no clients when I met her, she said she was soon expecting to take charge of some seven-year-olds.
"I make them eat and eat and eat. And then drink lots and lots of water," she explained.

"I make them do this all morning. Then they have a rest. In the afternoon we start again. We do this three times a day - the morning, the afternoon and the evening."

Punishment

She said the girls could end up weighing between 60 to 100 kilograms, "with lots of layers of fat."


Fatematou said that it was rare for a girl to refuse to eat, and that if they did, she was helped by the child's parents.
"They punish the girls and in the end the girls eat," she said.

"If a girl refuses we start nicely, saying 'come on, come on' sweetly, until she agrees to eat."

Fatematou admitted that sometimes the girls cried at the treatment.

"Of course they cry - they scream," she said.

"We grab them and we force them to eat. If they cry a lot we leave them sometimes for a day or two and then we come back to start again.

"They get used to it in the end."

She argued that in the end the girls were grateful.

"When they are small they don't understand, but when they grow up they are fat and beautiful," she said.

"They are proud and show off their good size to make men dribble. Don't you think that's good?"

Change

However, the view that a fat girl is more desirable is now becoming seen as old-fashioned.

A study by the Mauritanian ministry of health has found that force-feeding is dying out. Now only 11% of young girls are force fed.


We're fed up of fat women
Yusuf, 19

"That's not how people think now," Leila - a woman in the ancient desert town of Chinguetti, who herself was fattened as a child - told The World Today.

Monday, August 15, 2005

PLEASE, DON'T QUOTE ME!





Dumbest Quotes Ever

These were sent in by a subscriber and we cannot attest to their accuracy...But aren't they hilarious?

Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?

Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever," --Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest.
----
"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff." --Mariah Carey.
----
"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life," --Brooke Shields, during an interview to become Spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign.
----
"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body,"--Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.
----
"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country," --Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC.
----
"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president." --Hillary Clinton commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents.
----
"That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass,and I'm just the one to do it," --A congressional candidate in Texas.
----
"Half this game is ninety percent mental." --Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark.
----
"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it." --Al Gore, Vice President (DUH.)
----
"I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix." -- Dan Quayle.
----
"We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?"--Lee Iacocca
----
"The word 'genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein." --Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst.
----
"We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people." --Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor.
----
"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure." --Bill Clinton, former US president ( to perhaps be fair, we'll do Bushisms another day.)
----
"We are ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur." --Al Gore, former US Vice President.
----
"Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas." -Keppel Enderbery
----
"Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances." --Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina
----
"If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record." --Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman.

-- Thanks to Scott for submitting these.

Quick Thinking

A senior citizen in Florida bought a brand new Mercedes convertible.
He took off down the road, flooring it to 80 mph and enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left on his head.

"This is great," he thought as he roared down I-75. He pushed the pedal to the metal even more. Then he looked in his rear view mirror and saw a highway patrol trooper behind him, blue lights flashing and siren blaring.

"I can get away from him with no problem"thought the man and he tromped it some more and flew down the road at over 100 mph. Then 110,120 mph!

Then he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this kind of thing." He pulled over to the side of the road and waited for the trooper to catch up with him.

Sunday, August 14, 2005

Wanna BoggieWoggie?


Yeah!
Do you want to boggieWoggie with me?

This blog is the party site!

Music, movies and moments of pleasure for your enjoyment.
This is the fun blog.
No essays, no politics and no polemics.

Just gist.

So, welcome to BoggyWoggy!