Friday, January 20, 2006

Flirting 101

When I was in High School I was very popular with the girls and I had over 22 female companions. There were girls who were my fans and others who were my fanatics. Then, I was a regular Roman Catholic boy and loved by almost everybody. My father always wanted me to follow him everywhere and my mother dressed me up like a woman. And it was at the age of 11 that one huge man nearly raped me. But, I escaped. And I noticed that both females and males found me attractive. Naturally, I became a flirt. And till date, I am still a flirt.

Here is an article about flirting.

Suddenly Single

Flirting 101
By Marcia Jedd

Listen up all you shy guys out there: Flirting can catch you more good-hearted women than you ever imagined. Plus, it's a lot of fun and a great way to find friends along the way.

If you have trouble capturing the attention of a woman, try these pointers:

Find commonalties

Think of the first three letters of "flirt" — signifying Find Like Interests. A great conversation starter is to compliment her on her hair, clothing, jewelry or other accessory. "What a cool ring!" just may be an invitation to hear it's her birthstone. Find the commonality. With a reply such as "My sister has that birthday month," you've just started a legitimate conversation.

Keep an open heart

If you get turned down in one area, try something else. At a recent singles wine tasting in Chicago where the women stayed at designated tables and the men rotated tables, Tom was disappointed when Martha rejected his extended hand for a handshake, citing flu season. He felt dissed because she had just shook the hand of his friend. Later in the evening, Tom approached Martha in a more playful way and she apologized, saying she became fickle when she realized she might have to shake all of the men's hands. Martha got over her sheepishness about the incident and the two exchanged business cards.

Expressions count

Gentlemanly gestures tell her you are polite and possibly interested in more. Offer your place in line at a buffet, or the old standby, "May I get you a drink?" A raise of the eyebrows at even her slightest provocative comment communicates you are listening. Returned gestures are usually positive. For example, when you see a woman mirroring your body language — even from across the room — she may be interested. Remember, verbal flirting and body contact communicate your interest the loudest, but gestures such as eye contact, winking and mirroring send a signal. Be aware of your body language, sitting and standing. Avoid "closed" signals like crossed arms and hands in pockets.

Don't critique

Above all, keep your flirting light and fun. Harry, 41, wasn't playing it cool when he shared with Sue that he thought she and her two friends had "put up a wall" to others around them at a mixer. Sue disagreed and took offense to Harry's comment. As Sue tells it, she and her friends were engrossed in a conversation about reality TV shows and discounted Harry's off-point entrée into the conversation. Harry could have met with success if he jumped into the chat with a comment on the shows.

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